It’s my birthday!! Shower me with gifts and love! Love me! Kidding. But yeah, I’m 19 today (scary Mary), and I feel old. 

Like, I know I’m not old. I’m actually very young. I’ve loads of living left to do. But, like every other entitled and narcissistic millenial, I feel like I have a wealth of experiences to draw on at my young age.

So, here are the 19 things I’ve learned at the ripe old age of 19. You’re welcome.

1. Always Give More Than You Get

Follow this, and you’ll never be in the wrong again. Always give 110%, and you can be sure that when things go downhill, you don’t have to worry about yourself, because you did everything you possibly could

2. Cover Your Arse

Similar to the last point, but honestly will save you so much time and arguments. Just do everything the first time, and make sure you think of everything before charging in.

3. If Possible, Take the High Road

It makes you look better. But, if they really hurt you, aint nothing wrong with getting it off your chest.

4. Don’t Be Petty

It’s ugly. You’re better than that.

5. Drink More Water!!!

6. Worrying About Money Won’t Give You More Money

Unless you are at critical situation, stop worrying about money. You’re so young. What the fuck.

7. Problem? Have a Bath

8. More Problems? Go Outside

Fresh air: it works. Who knew?

9. Laugh At Yourself, and Everyone Else Will Laugh With You 

In an awkward or embarrassing situation? Laugh it off. It’ll make everyone else comfortable, and make yourself feel better when they’re laughing with you, rather than at you.

10. Stretch More

Trust me.

11. Change Your Bedding, Do Some Dusting, and Hoover More

A clean environment makes for a clean and healthy mind.

12. Stop Playing Yourself Down To Everyone

You are interesting, you are funny, and you are pretty. I mean it. You know it, so prove it.

13. It’s Better to Be ‘Silly-Funny’ Than ‘Mean-Funny’

14. You Will Never Regret Making More Effort, You Will Only Regret Making Less

15. Stop Thinking Everything Means Something. It Doesn’t.

Sometimes shit happens, and we have to just accept it. It doesn’t have an almighty meaning, and it doesn’t count towards your karma-points. Learn from things, and move on. Stop making meaning when there isn’t any.

16. Stop Thinking Everything You Do Has To Mean Something. It Doesn’t.

You want to eat 3 cheeseburgers in a row? Go for it. You want to get a tattoo of a panda holding a rifle? Why the hell not? You want to write a book about what it’s like to be YOU? Do it. Not everything has to be Big and Meaningful.

17. Remember Your Age

You’re young. Stop thinking like an 80 year old. Do something stupid. Make mistakes. It’s okay.

18. You’re Allowed To Be Sad Sometimes

19. But Being Sad Will Get You Nowhere

Get help. Do things. Make connections. Nothing is worth feeling like it’s the end of the world, but having to smile anyway.

And there you have it. My impartial bits of wisdom that I have selflessly shared with you lot so you don’t make the same mistakes as me. But at the same time, what do I know? A year from now I could be making another one of these posts and say exactly the opposite of everything I’ve just said so… do whatever you want. Or something.

Honestly though, thank you for following me on this little blog for as long as you have, even if you haven’t for very long. I’m still working at this blogging thing (and generally this ‘life’ thing) and doing this makes things a lot more fun and interesting. I look forward to the next year of my life carrying on with this blog and meeting more of you lovely people.

Here’s to the next year (THE LAST ONE OF BEING A TEENAGER).

Jess x