A Beginner’s Guide to a Trichy Life: Introductions

Am currently sat, wondering how on earth to start this blog post. I know what I want it to be about, and roughly what I should mention… but how to start?

How do I introduce to, possibly total strangers, what I struggle with on a daily basis? How do I accurately explain to those reading (admittedly, not many), something that I feel defines me so? Where do I even begin?

Maybe from the beginning? Might be an idea?

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“Insert-Motivational-Quote-Here”

At the start of this academic year (about  a month and a half ago), I swore to myself that this year would be different.

I swore to myself, and everyone around me (mainly to give myself more of an incentive to actually do it) that I would change. I would do all the things that everyone says they’re going to do, and never even begin. I found this very easy to say, as the summer holidays drew to a close, and the new school year came fast around the corner. For some reason the idea of starting anew as I begin a new year of my ever-decreasing education seems more achievable to me than, say, making those infamous ‘New Year Resolutions’ on January 1st.

The list of changes I wanted to incorporate this past September included things like working harder in college (as am currently in last year of A levels, this is v important), eating healthier, cutting out bad habits, cutting out even worse habits, eating better, and doing things for me. Things that I hoped would ultimately put me in the best possible place to catapult me into the future I really want for myself.

Thing is, I really want these things. I really, desperately want to be that kind of person that everyone hates because they just have their shit together (excuse my french). I want to be the person that rocks up to the gym at 5am, works out intensely, looking amazing while doing so, then has hardcore study sessions, and on top of that, has a great social life to brag about.

Of course, all that is the stuff of cheesy business-man films and even those people who seem to have it all together on Instagram don’t actually have their lives together to that extent. On top of that, I had to realize at some point that even if I had all that, I wouldn’t necessarily be better of, or even happier.

So I had to make compromises. I still struggle with concentration and motivation (hence why I’m writing this blog post and not my comprehension questions for media) and I still have those terrible habits, like long lie ins and too much chocolate. But I am trying. And, she adds proudly, seeing improvements.

I’ve seen improvements in my body (being more awake/alert, getting fitter from cheer-leading), my brain (focusing more, motivated with my college work) and my emotional/mental health (which is still fluctuating, but really, I’m trying). And it’s nice to see.

Not to mention I’ve done a lot. For myself, that is. I’ve started my university applications, made doctors and dentist appointments (very helpful with recovering from anxiety issues) and trying to stay with the right social circle that are going to support and motivate me to carry on with this good behaviour (still working out the kinks).

What I’ve found with this whole re-inventing/improving yourself malarky, is not to cut and paste an entirely new persona all at once. It’s about making small, doable changes, and once you’ve achieved them, working on the next thing. One step at a time.

I can do this…

Right?

Justified Injustice // Poetry Series Part 4

A Series of Haiku On Living

Where is the beauty

In believing we should die?

This is not beauty.

Where is the beauty

In wanting to stay in bed

For days, weeks on end?

It’s not beautiful.

Not brave, romantic, or cute

To wish away life.

There should be light in

Everything around us.

Not dark, emptiness.

Where flowers can grow,

There will always be a light.

There is light in you.

See this light, and you

Too, can live the way you wish.

No one can stop you.

You may feel as though,

This life is weighed on your hands.

That you cannot breathe.

You must know. Know this;

There is nothing in your way.

Do not stop yourself

From living, loving.

From experiencing life.

From knowing yourself.

See the light around

You, and feel the warmth it gives.

You are not alone.